Why would a law firm hire a PR agency? Well, if you’ve ever wished your firm was known for its expertise and thought leadership, a PR agency might be just the thing. Jared brings on Michelle Calcote King to talk through the lawyer/PR relationship and its potential for improving your credibility, furthering your reach, and growing your business.
The rest of the show is a total Succession-fest. Jared’s monologue spoils the entire beginning, middle, and end of the series, so listeners beware. And, later on in the Rump Roast, Jared welcomes his own kids for dramatic readings of some favorite Succession quotes.
Michelle Calcote King is principal and president of Reputation Ink.
We have fun on this show, but today it’s all business – Succession style.
Our opening track is Two Cigarettes by Major Label Interest.
Our Rump Roast song is Macbeth by JeesGuy.
Our closing track is Lucky Day by SPARKZ.
Special thanks to our
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Male: It’s a Legal Toolkit with Jared Correia. With guest Michelle Calcote King. We frankly just talk a lot about succession on this one but then maybe we’ll get to our segment where we guide you to one of life’s great treasures. But first, your host, jared Correia.
Jared Correia: All aboard, it’s the Legal Toolkit podcast pulling into the station. Hope you’ve got your ticket because if not, I can get surly like Tom Hanks on the Polar Express, don’t fuck with me. And yes, it’s still called the Legal Toolkit podcast even though my spud wrench may be used to do stuff with potatoes, I don’t really know. I’m your host, Jared Correia, you’re stuck with me because Wayne Brady was unavailable. He was busy being even whiter than I. I’m the CEO of Red Cave Law Firm Consulting, a business management consulting service for attorneys and bar associations. Find us online at redcavelegal.com. I’m the COO of Gideon Software. We build chat bots so law firms can convert more leads and conversational document assembly tools so law .firms can build documents faster and more accurately. Schedule a demo to check out our new e-signature tool at gideonlegal.com.
Now, before we get to our interview today with Michelle Calcote King of Reputation Ink, I need to unburden myself about how sad I am the succession is now over. So I’m about to spoil the fuck out of Succession. If you haven’t seen the show through to its conclusion yet, just skip to the guest interview. Unless, that is ,you don’t care about being spoiled. The best thing I’ve done this year by about a country mile was when I texted my wife during one of her business meetings, Logan is dead. Now, my wife doesn’t watch Succession and she assumed that someone we knew had died. So, she rushed out of the meeting to call me. She was really mad. I’d like to think that that was kind of a reflection of the impact of Succession, kind of like when the Waystar Royko stock tanked, when Logan actually died on the show. I told my wife that and she said I was a fucking idiot.
So if you haven’t seen any of it, Succession is about a fictional family, the Roys, who owned the fictional company Waystar Royko and they’re pretty obviously based on Rupert Murdoch and his family and their holdings, including a Fox News stand-in called ATN which plays a major role in the series. Logan’s dad, you already know he dies, but the show starts with him having a health crisis and so all his kids are jockeying for position and trying to figure out who’s going to take over the company. Logan has four kids. Connor is a total shithead and not interested in the family business at all. He later marries an escort. He’s played by Alan Ruck, who you may remember as Cameron in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. Kendall is the second son, he’s a fuckup that can’t get out of his own way. Yet, he’s probably the most suited for the CEO position if I’m being honest evven though he is a drug addict and kills dude during the show’s run. Yeah, the bar is pretty low. Roman is the youngest brother, who was beaten and traumatized by his father as a child, maybe even kept in a cage, it’s alluded to in the show, and so he’s all kinds of fucked up. He sort of want to be sexual deviant who can’t actually fuck anything. He’s played by Macaulay Culkin’s younger brother, Kieran, who was the kid in Home Alone who always peed the bed, so maybe that tracks. Shiv is Logan’s oldest daughter and youngest child — oldest daughter, how about only daughter– and she’s kind of a ballbuster. She has political expertise but not a lot of experience in managing the family business. She’s always out there seeking approval. And her husband, Tom, works at Waystar too in a real job. Kendall’s divorced, Roman maybe has a kid and a mistress at the start of the show but then that family disappears.
So the entire show is really based around who’s going to succeed Logan among his children and about the lengths they’ll go or that Logan will have them go to, to position themselves for taking the big chair. Now, Succession isn’t my favorite TV show ever. I like several shows more but it is a brilliant television series in its own right and has a lot to recommend there like that cast I just alluded to. Yeah, that’s right. Ferris Bueller’s best friend and Macaulay. Culkin’s brother are holding it down on the best TV show in the world. Brian Cox who plays Logan Roy is a Shakespearean actor who also happens to be the original Hannibal Lecter fun fact.
He started Michael Mann’s Manhunter in 1986. Jeremy Strong, who plays Kendall is fucking amazing in the show. He knows method acting style only makes sense dramaturgically and apparently really pissed off Brian Cox. Sarah Snook who plays Shiv is a really complete actress and she communicates a lot simply using facial expressions. Matthew Macfadyen who plays Tom is maybe the best character on the whole show. Honestly, he’s hilarious. He just crushes the one-liners time after time. He was Mr. Darcy and Pride and Prejudice with some righteous sideburns too. What’s even more impressive is that while the show is scripted, is heavily improvisational in practice and the actors seem to play off each other really well. This makes dialogue seem natural pretty much at all times and so it’s no surprise that Succession is probably the most memeable show ever and don’t fret, we’ll have more on the dialogue in Succession before we close the show.
In fact, yes, we are embarking on a dramatic reading, so stay tuned. Even the supporting cast is great. Karl, the CFO, is the master of roast this past season. Gerri, the chief legal officer and sometimes CEO is kind of savage and has an affair of sorts with Roman. Frank, the vice-chairman is Karl’s best bud and is in and out of Logan’s favor constantly. Well, so is everyone else, I guess. Cousin Greg is your favorite dipshit, grafter suck up, but his interactions as Tom’s errand boy are the most consistently hilarious part of what Succession does. Even pull off these crazy casting tricks for minor roles like the American cousin from Perfect Strangers is Connor’s political adviser. Alexander Skarsgard roles in as a CEO of Spotify. Excuse me, Go Joe is what they call him. Adrien Brody is another tech CEO. Holly Hunter is a Waystar CEO. One point, James Cromwell is Logan’s brother. Stephen Root is a religiously steep political leader. Seriously, I’m leaving people out but Succession has the most consistently excellent actors on probably any production ever which is really what sets this apart.
Now, i clearly love Succession, but it’s been criticized too. Some people have trouble getting into the show on part because it profiles a bunch of assholes. And admittedly, the show takes about a season and a half or so, or maybe a half season to really take off for you to really get into it. But the first set of episodes is maybe B+ versus A+, so there’s not a tremendous difference there. And I mean, I can’t watch bad people on TV. This strikes me as kind of disingenuous when folks are out there watching shows like The Real Housewives of New Jersey and these people are actors. So you’re not going to read Othello because Iago is kind of a dick. Come on now. Also, have you ever heard of The Sopranos or Mad Men or Breaking Bad or should like gone?
And speaking of Shakespeare, I think Succession works so well because it’s sort of like a stage play. It’s like a modern Shakespeare play in fact, and I like a cheesy modern reimagining of Shakespeare like Romeo and Juliet. Succession is like what Shakespeare would have written had there been no Shakespeare previously and he decided to create a show for HBO. Succession is affecting and compelling without hitting you over the head with these themes. They’re not trying to make direct obvious and overt illusions to Shakespeare. Jesse Armstrong and the show’s creative team are simply making deep observations about the world around them in much the same way that Shakespeare was writing Titus Andronicus for his modern audience without trying to make callbacks to Shakespeare.
Some folks think Succession gets far more credit for being more intellectual than it actually is, but I think those people couldn’t be more wrong. I don’t think he gets enough credit for that. One of the reasons Succession is so profound is because of its restraint. Any other clear echoes of Shakespeare in much of the show’s plot. King Lear, being the most obvious. Kendall has been seen as a perverse version of Prince Hal from Henry IV Part 2. Richard III is illustrative of the Ken, Shiv and Tom triangle and how it resolves. Julius Caesar is certainly inspiration for the funeral episode in the last season featuring his it does two dueling eulogies. Tom and Shiv are the Macbeth’s. Lucas Madsen seizes power like Fortinbras and Hamlet. Succession is Shakespeare without trying too hard and that is right about in my wheelhouse is a former English major. But maybe the most impressive stroke of genius from the Succession team was the show ended after only four seasons and frankly, they could have done many more seasons. I was honestly sort of shocked that Succession ended as soon as it did, but because they ended on a high note, like George Costanza, the final season was totally insane and they did some crazy shit that no one really expected. The entire season took place over the course of basically one and a half weeks, focusing on the most important stretch of the Roy siblings’ lives and ratcheting up the pressure to 11.
Logan was killed off in the third episode last season off-screen. That’s kind of like a theatrical mechanism to know when most people are expecting him to live until close to the show’s end. it was kind of like how death occurs in real life too fast. Shocking, never enough words to convey the gravity of the situation. So the rest of the season is as Shiv calls it, a coronation demolition derby and that’s kind of perfect because there’s corporate backstabbing and unexpected twists right up until the very end of the show like literally last five minutes. I honestly wish more shows will go out early rather than sticking around too late. So there’s no unnecessary revenge fantasy quota like at the end of Breaking Bad and The X-Files ends with Mulder still on the team and there are fewer weaker episodes before Mad Men or the Sopranos ends on a strong note. Like Tim Robbins in Shawshank Redemption, Succession crushed this last season and finale by applying time and pressure. But you know what they say, you can’t make an tomelet(ph) without breaking some gregs. Let’s find out more about what our sponsors can do for your busy law practice before we talk PR and marketing strategy with Michelle Calcote King of Reputation Ink. Then stay tuned as we talk even more of Succession. That’s right, we’re not done yet even if the show is finished.
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Jared Correia: Okay, let’s get to the meat in the middle of this legal podcasting sandwich. Today’s meat is pepperoni sausage and ham. It matches my daughter’s pizza order from last night. I wish she only one slice Womp Waffle in my life. Michelle, how are you?
Michelle Calcote King: I’m great.
Jared Correia: I’m going to intro people in the second as I relay my relative domestic bliss. You just heard from our guest making her first appearance on the Legal Toolkit podcast. That’s Michelle Calcote King who’s the principal and president, both of those things, at Reputation Ink.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: Welcome to the show.
Michelle Calcote King: Thanks for having me. I’m doing great. Yeah. Excited about this.
Jared Correia: Are you sure?
Michelle Calcote King: I promise.
Jared Correia: I feel like that’s very question. We were just talking before we started recording and I think that if I read this correctly, you spent some time in Jacksonville, Florida?
Michelle Calcote King: I live in Jacksonville, Florida, yeah.
Jared Correia: You live in Jackson, Florida?
Michelle Calcote King: Mm-hmm, yeah.
Jared Correia: Which is like just gigantic.
Michelle Calcote King: It is the largest city by land size in the United States.
Jared Correia: Okay, good. I thought I had heard that like I have been in Jacksonville and have just been staggered by how big it is and–
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, it’s super spread out. Yeah.
Jared Correia: I got lost.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, it causes a lot of problems honestly.
Jared Correia: Yeah, like how do you find your way around? Do you leave like a trail of
bread crumbs or–
Michelle Calcote King: I personally, I’m a bit of — I stick to my little neighborhood and surround–I have friends that joke but I never cross the bridge over to the beaches. So I live in a very historic neighborhood right near downtown and kind of stick to that, yeah. Yeah, if you talk to anybody, Jacksonville is a decent place to live but it’s got a lot of problems compared to other cities and it all comes back to the fact that it is just so spread out.
Jared Correia: That’s wild.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: And your neighborhood is probably like the size of Texas, I would guess.
Michelle Calcote King: No, my neighborhood is one square mile and that’s what I’m saying, I stick to that.
Jared Correia: That seems to be the safest way to do it.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, exactly.
Jared Correia: All right, let’s talk about like legal-related stuff.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: So you’ve been in the PR space for a while and I don’t know a lot of law firms that hire PR agencies.
Michelle Calcote King: Really?
Jared Correia: No, I don’t know. Maybe I’m talking to the wrong law firms, I don’t know. Apparently, you found enough that you’ve been able to stay in business. So like why would a law firm hire a PR agency? From my perspective, it’s a relatively rare thing to do.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah. Interesting. Well, so, it’s a niche. So, what we do is we work primarily with B2B firms, so corporate firm.
Jared Correia: Right.
Michelle Calcote King: So we don’t we don’t work with, you know, personal injury, those kind of firms, and what we are primarily do, I’d say the majority of our work is getting thought leadership published for attorneys. So kind of facilitating that process of getting them, you know, quoted in articles, writing articles. A big portion of it is writing articles, getting them appearing on podcasts and then a lot of awards submissions. And I know that kind of gets — there’s a lot of negatives around awards but it’s a big credibility enhancer for firms. So things like Chambers submissions, all the law 360 profiles, the National Law Journal, American – you know, ALM. They do a lot of looking for attorneys who specialize in this area, who have done big work in this area, that kind of thing. So it’s more, it’s thought leadership and awards which form the bulk of our work and it’s a pre– like for law firms, especially corporate firms, your traditional business firms, the ones we work with, that’s the majority of the marketing that they do. They don’t do all the SEO and, you know, email marketing and stuff that you would kind of associate with traditional marketing. They’re just publishing articles and making sure they’re kind of positioned in those awards and profiles of attorneys doing the kind of work that they want to be known for doing.
Jared Correia: Yeah, let’s talk about awards because that gets derided quite a bit as you know.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: So if I wanted to be like, I was a Vermont attorney, I want to be the Cavochis(ph) Man of the Year, like I would come to you or something like that. So like how complicated is that process?
Michelle Calcote King: You know, it’s kind of, I–
Jared Correia: Not that award but like–
Michelle Calcote King: Right.
Michelle Calcote King: Right. It’s what I’ve been doing my entire career. So I try to recall.
Michelle Calcote King: Right. It’s basically looking at, so we track all the legal awards, so we put out a newsletter once a month that say, you know, and we’ll track every practice area, every geography that we can, let’s say, you know, the New Jersey legal awards are coming out for ALM and they’re looking for the top energy attorneys or whatever practice area that they’re looking at. And so it’s basically looking at the submission requirements and writing a compelling piece that positions them as the one to — and we kind of know what these publications are looking for, because most of them are published by publishers. So they’re looking for a good story. So we kind of help, we kind of work with attorneys and kind of go, well, that’s not — you know, can we build this into a bigger story? Is there something more — we’ll try to kind of pick apart what might be interesting. Because, you know, we’re thinking about it from that media perspective, attorneys aren’t, so we do that process and we kind of go back and forth. And it’s a write-up, it’s you know, it’s normally like a pager too, saying, and we’re trying to kind of give the publication a reason to want to feature this law firm and it’s work. And so we’re kind of pulling apart and putting together that story. So yeah.
Jared Correia: That’s interesting. So like I think awards get a bad rep sometimes because I think people view them as like just pay to play.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah. And there’s a lot of that kind of out there.
Jared Correia: Right? But that’s not all of them.
Michelle Calcote King: Right.
Jared Correia: And it’s not like there’s a competitive process regardless.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah. There really is, yeah. There’s a lot of really substantial ones. I mean, the biggest chambers. So we do those chambers submissions, those are like many many, many pages and that process and to be honest, I’m not a chamber’s expert because I haven’t done one in years. My team does them.
Jared Correia: Yeah, that makes sense.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, but it’s–
Jared Correia: It sounds something a lawyer wouldn’t want to do on his or her own.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, yeah. So we do a lot of that kind of heavy lifting of —and then my team knows, you know, well they’re going to run a look at this kind of case for this reason or this isn’t going to be interesting for this reason, so we’re kind of helping figure out what’s the compelling part of it and then we’re writing it up. So, you know, a lot of a PR person’s job is just to do the work that a journalist would do on behalf of the client and serve it up to the journalist in a way that it makes their job easy, but also they go, “Oh, my readers are going to be really interested in that”, so.
Jared Correia: And I suppose it’s a similar process when you’re talking about trying to place lawyers as sources for journalists because like and there’s ways to do that too like people know about probably like the help of a reporter thing.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: You get the email and you basically pitch yourself to journalists. I know a lot of lawyers who get attention from journalists because of their Twitter profiles, but at any point, like pitching yourself to the journalists, right? So you help attorneys with that as well?
Michelle Calcote King: We do that, yeah. I mean, I call that newsjacking. I didn’t come up with the term.
Jared Correia: Newjacking, that sounds dangerous.
Michelle Calcote King: Newsjacking. I know, I sounds a little weird. It’s basically the process of — I’ll give you an example. I use this example a lot. It’s the process of inserting yourself or the client into a story that they might not have had anything to do.
So, I’ll give you one of the best examples I have is we had a client who had a lot of experience doing special investigations. So they were on the Whitewater investigation. He led the investigation into an Alabama governor who ended up getting impeached over a scandal where he had an affair with a staffer in his office. And so–
Jared Correia: Like call his ex-staff, yeah.
Michelle Calcote King: Right. But he understands how these complex investigations work. So when the Trump Mueller investigation came out, and he wanted to build a reputation for being a leading expert in this kind of special investigation. So when the Trump Mueller investigation started, we went out to the media and said, “Hey, if you’ve got questions about this investigation, here’s a guy that was on Whitewater. He led this investigation. He can help you like parse through why Miller did this or what’s about to happen or what it means and the contacts”. So we do that initial introduction and then each step of the investigation, we would go out with an email. We’d get a couple of quotes from the attorney. “Hey, Mueller did this today. Here’s the impact. Here’s what he might do next. Here’s why–“ And so, he got quoted widely throughout that and honestly we worked ourselves out of a job a little bit because then he’s the kind of go to guy on a journalist.
Jared Correia: Context, yeah.
Michelle Calcote King: Right, yeah, on a journalist Rolodex. Today, no, okay, if I’m going to report on a story about this, this guy really helps me kind of clarify and understand that. And then you know, and it’s not just the media coverage of sort of like what you do with that. So then we package all that up. We put it on a page on the website. if anyone is googling, you know, so let’s say this guy, now gets a referral for special investigation work, they’re going to google him and they’re going to come up with a ream of him being quoted in CNBC and the Washington Post and, you know, new York Times, and they’re going to go, “Oh, this guy”, you know, so that’s sort of how it plays into that credibility enhancer thing that caused the process of hiring a firm or an attorney.
Jared Correia: Yeah.
Michelle Calcote King: We actually love doing that work. It’s really fun and it’s great whenever you’ve got an attorney who’s good at it, who can kind of quickly send you a quote or two and we can get it out and then they can get on the phone with the media and talk them through it. Because lawyers are perfectly positioned for that kind of work too because the media has to report on pretty complex legal stuff. They’re not lawyers, so they need someone who could kind of break it down and give them the insight. So if I have a client who’s good at, you know, simplifying things, giving a couple of quotes, walking journalist through that, journalist love it and then it kind of becomes a beneficial relationship. And then that journalist has that like, you know, one night just Google history for when they are researched.
Jared Correia: Okay, so that’s all helpful.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: I kind of begin to understand now why law firm would hire PR firm. Let’s talk about the content part of it.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, mm-hmm.
Jared Correia: You talked a little bit about like e-books or web content, like how does that work for you? Like do you find that lawyers are willing to write stuff on their own, put stuff together? Or is it more like you’re doing it or is it different for different lawyers?
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, it’s different for different lawyers. So I would say that lawyer one — unfortunately, lawyer too see themselves as writers and we work with other professional services. So we work with architects, engineers, that kind of thing and lawyers are the distinct grouping that says, you know, I’d rather take a stab at this first.
Jared Correia: I feel like you’re trying to say, they think they’re good at writing.
Michelle Calcote King: It’s just–
Jared Correia: I would try this certain medium.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, it’s a different kind of writing. They were taught a certain kind of writing for law school that just doesn’t work well at all for the media, doesn’t work well at all for the internet, you know, very verbose and takes forever to get to the point, you know, that kind of thing. So we prefer to be the writers ourselves. I’ve got one former lawyer on my team, but convincing a lawyer that a non-lawyer can take a stab at a first draft of an article is often really difficult in a way that it’s not difficult for an engineer or an architect. So that’s going to struggle over the years. And, you know, so what we’re often doing is going out to the media and saying, “Hey, this new law was passed through this regulation or this trend is happening. We think your readers would want an article on this. I have this attorney who can write it” and because of how the media were especially trade publications, they’re very thinly staffed. They rely on what I call contributed content. So they want content written by people in the field doing the work. it’s a real new model nowadays. So that’s what a lot of PR people are doing really is kind of writing the content that goes into a lot of these media outlets. Not all of them, there’s big outlets, like Law Firm 60(ph) that are very well staffed and pretty timely content on their own.
But the smaller niche trade publications really, they have maybe an editor or two who are really just sourcing content from you know, the actual doers in the field and wears a really well the position for that. So often what we’re doing is we’re kind of figuring out the topic for the lawyer like, you know, sometimes the person has something and we’re like, well we need to make it a little more timely. You know, the news is all about what happened now. So we certainly have to bring in the why are we talking about this now sometimes if it’s not something new.
Jared Correia: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Michelle Calcote King: Then we’re kind of doing that back and forth between the editor. We are looking at what do they — you know, what are the guidelines. They all have editorial guidelines and then we’re working with the attorneys. Often, they are producing the first draft and we’re editing it and kind of being that editor and go between to get it to the final place. If we can write the first draft, we prefer that on the legal side of things. It doesn’t always happen, so.
Jared Correia: Makes sense. And I guess the obvious question that everybody’s probably asking themselves right now is like who’s writing content anymore? Why don’t we just use AI to do everything?
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, I know.
Jared Correia: Do you get that from attorneys? Do you get–?
Michelle Calcote King: You know, I get that more from friends, kike, are you going out of business? Well, we do.
Jared Correia: Carry your friends.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, yeah. I know. Yeah, exactly. What we do is not, you know, AI is very much taking what is already existing out there in Google land and regurgitating it. So we’re creating — I use this phrase called knowledge extraction. I borrowed it from another agency. We’re taking what’s in the heads of our clients and creating contents and it’s typically because of how the media works, it’s new, it’s new concepts, it’s new ideas, it’s new laws, it’s new cases, it’s, you know. So I think Ai and I’ll be honest, I’ve got a really jump on it a lot more than I have but I think AI will just be a tool in the way that the internet is a tool.
Jared Correia: Do it quick before it destroys humanity.
Michelle Calcote King: Right. Yeah, exactly.
Jared Correia: I got one more question for you.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: Obviously like people are writing stuff which is the traditional medium for getting into newspapers, and traditional models. What about videos? Like do you help firms with that? Do you think that’s viable? And what are we doing? Like long-form stuff or is like all TicTok at this point?
Michelle Calcote King: I think it’s more short form. You know with what’s lawyers do, a lot of it is, I’m a big believer in podcasting. Podcasting with video.
Jared Correia: Yeah, me too.
Michelle Calcote King: It’s just fantastic way to–
Jared Correia: Evelyn(ph), you listening to this? Go ahead.
Michelle Calcote King: My own podcast has been a huge lead generator for us. So yeah, if I could get more lawyers to get on the podcasting bandwagon and do that. Most of the video we’re doing is more like biovideos where they’re kind of talking a little bit about themselves, what they do or–
Jared Correia: Drop that on the website kind of thing.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah. Or it’s a brand video where it’s like the work here, you know helping them with recruiting, that kind of thing. If I were advising a client around video, it would be more of this kind of video where they’re sharing insights around a timely topic. Because really the content that works well for law firms is where they’re just showcasing their expertise and the only way to do that is by tackling topics that their clients are asking them. And it’s a sort of the same thing we’re doing in feeding to the media. They could be feeding directly to their own channels, their video.
Jared Correia: I thought we’d tackle some tough topics.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah.
Jared Correia: Thank you Michelle for coming in.
Michelle Calcote King: Absolutely. Glad to do it.
Jared Correia: Have been running all over Jacksonville in the year firmly.
Michelle Calcote King: Yeah, I stay in my one square mile, yeah.
Jared Correia: I appreciate it. So everybody will take one final sponsor break so you can hear more about what our sponsor companies can do for you including the latest offerings. Then stay tuned for the rump roast. That’s right. It’s even more supple than the roast beast.
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Dave Scriven-Young: You like legal podcasts because you’re curious and want to be the best attorney you can be. I’m Dave Scriven-Young, host of Litigation Radio, produced by ABA’s Litigation Section with Legal Talk Network. Search in your favorite podcast player for Litigation Radio to join me and my guests as we examine hot topics in litigation and topics that will help you to develop your litigation skills and build your practice. I hope you’ll check out Litigation Radio and join the ABA Litigation Section for access to all of the resources, relationships, and referrals you need to thrive as a litigator.
Jared Correia: Welcome to the rear end of the Legal Toolkit. That’s right, it’s rump roast. It’s a grab bag of short-form topics, all of my choosing. Why do I get to pick? Because I’m the host. As you just heard, I’m really broken up about Succession ending. It was such a great show. So to try and cope with my loss, the loss of Logan and everyone else, I thought I would host my own version of Succession and have my kids read some of the best dialogue from the show. Hopefully, they don’t know I fucked this up like Kendall fucked everything up. Because one day, I want to pass this podcast along to them and they need to be ready. Clearly, they don’t know how to podcast because they’re opening packages while I try to record this. I’m afraid they’re not serious people. Now, let me just note that we’ll be bleeping out what my kids say because we don’t want them to be actually swearing. I’m not a monster. I have them using fudge for fuck, etc.
All right, now that that’s done, I’m going to bring them in. Okay, guys, you know i like the show Succession and now it’s over. But one of the reasons I like the show so much as it had great dialogues. I wanted to clip some of that dialogue and have you read them, mostly out of context. Joe, let’s start with you. You got the first one.
Joe: I’ve never made it this high in the [bleep] at the time. We were the pool boys, right? Frank [bleep] Banana cabana?
Female: Yeah, we’re doing (00:31:26) painting. Pervert!
Joe: I’m going to take a [bleep]. Would you like me to live stream it.
Female: (00:31:33) big daddy, but the king’s my daddy.
Joe: It’s like Jaws. If everyone in Jaws works for Jaws.
Female: He’s proving those on unseemly venues. I danced with this old man. Yeah, he didn’t want to dance and they made us talk. He was so confused. I drank things that aren’t normally drinks.
Forgive me, but are we talking to each other on the poop deck of a majestic schooner? It’s a salty brine stinging my weather-beaten face, no? Then why the [bleep] are you wearing a pair of deck shoes, man?
My hunch is that you are going to get [bleep] because I’ve never seen you [bleep] a lot and I’ve never seen Logan yet.
Jared Correia: Oh great. You certainly had me.
Joe: Your earlobes are thick and chewy like barnacle meat.
Female: Do you outscore your [bleep]? You got your right bullying, for your TED Talks. Your left lane for your (00:32:36)
Joe: If you can’t ride two horses at once, you shouldn’t be working at the circus. [Bleep]
Female: But now your difficult given she has so much of your blood.
Joe: I don’t care what you think here tribute band.
Female: Are you stupid doing me here? Is that where you went? Hang up Barbary [bleep]
Jared Correia: That was amazing.
Jared Correia: If you want to find out more about Michelle Calcote King in Reputation Ink, it’s rep-ink.com that’s R-E-P dash I-N-K dot com, rep-ink.com. Now for those of you listening in Sopchoppy, Florida, I’ve got a Spotify playlist for you featuring songs about business because that is what the Roys were all about. Now, when they’re not being complete assholes to each other. Now I run out of time today to talkk about how to find the clitoris. So you’re on your own there. This Jared Correia reminding you that you’re a clumsy interloper and no one trusts you. The only guy pulling for you is dead and now, you’re just married to the ex-boss’ daughter and she doesn’t even like you and your fear is squarely fucked, but you might still be named CEO after you volunteer to become a pain sponge. That seems like a fair trade.